{"product_id":"bureau-of-brain-management-necktie-medicated-and-opinionated-purple-statement-tie","title":"Bureau of Brain Management Necktie | Medicated and Opinionated Purple Statement Tie","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor those managing approximately seventeen tabs, three emotional support beverages, and one deeply overqualified nervous system. This soft purple statement necktie features the official-looking seal of the Bureau of Brain Management, because coping mechanisms deserve formal recognition. Subtle enough for work. Unhinged enough for people who understand what “functioning” really means. Ideal for office meetings, therapy appointments, school events, public hearings, or quietly surviving modern existence while remaining aggressively well-dressed.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct features\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e- 100% polyester with quick-dry durability\u003cbr\u003e- Soft satin finish for smooth, silky feel\u003cbr\u003e- Slim profile with V-shaped end\u003cbr\u003e- One-sided print with keeper loop to secure tie tail\u003cbr\u003e- Lightweight 105gsm fabric with sewn-in label\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e- Do not wash\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Do not tumble dry\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eOne Size\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e55.91\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.57 - 3.94\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"One Size","offer_id":54122495541523,"sku":"30043172595514807661","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0703\/7471\/9763\/files\/13042751795255921792_2048.jpg?v=1778114203","url":"https:\/\/www.epileptical.com\/products\/bureau-of-brain-management-necktie-medicated-and-opinionated-purple-statement-tie","provider":"EpiAl's Shop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}